Emotional Piano
by DychiMel36
Summary: Instead of meeting in a library, Ritsu and Masamune meet through emotional similarities. Masamune's emotions are played through beautiful pieces, but hapiness is absent. What caused his music to feel so tragic?
1. One

**I use songs by Philip Wesley and the story came to life**

 **I do NOT own Sekaiichi Hatsukoi or the characters**

* * *

Class was finally dismissed for the second week of school, and I'm doing alright in most of my classes (except math -_-'). When it comes to math I need to think about getting a tutor since I want to make my parents proud. My parents dream of me taking over my father's publishing company and I'm also engaged to someone I'm not interested in..

The worst part is that the girl they put me together with is emotionally fragile.I've known An-chan sice we were kids and we were the best of friends, but that was it. An-chan is not going along with it for the money since she confessed to me a while back and respected the rejection. What she didn't know was that I'm still not interested in her, but I don't have the confidence to tell her otherwise. I want to be a respectable son for my parents, but I believe that any respectable person needs to take initiative. Problem is that I'm clueless on how to tak initiative.

"Rit-chan." I looked up and my stomach start to tense up from nerves. Every time I see An-chan, guilt would leak into my mind. I turned and placed a phony smile on my face. "Rit-chan, your parents invited me to come over for dinner, so I want to bring dessert."

As I watch her digging through her bag, I felt my body heat up in anger towards mostly myself. _'Just tell her.' S_ elf-motivation wasn't enough to tell her and I doubt that it ever will.

"I wanted to use one of these recipes. What do you want to try?" She handed me two pieces of paper; one is a German Chocolate Cake and in my other hand was a white cake with strawberry filling. "Umm. I-I'll try this one." I handed her the recipe with the white cake, but I noticed right away that I couldn't look her in eye. She took the paper out of my hand and made contact to my hand in the process. It _burned_.

I honestly didn't want her to go out of her way for someone that doesn't love her back, even more so that I'm not honest with her. "Okay! Looks like fun. I'll bring it over tonight at six." She waved with a huge grin on her face and as she skip away merrily. _'Why do you smile at me? It makes my heart ache.'_

I walked down the hallway hoping that studying will distract my mind from the horrible pain coming from my stomach. My body was limp and weak like energy was being drained, then a tear fell to the earth. I cursed under my breath. _'Don't cry! This is going to be a HAPPY night. I can't ruin it!"_ I wiped the rest of the tears off my face, but they did not cease.

I leaned against the wall and wiped away the tears that rained on in one drop at a time. The thoughts of my engagement finally got to me, and I knew that there's no holding it in anymore. It took a while before I started to calm down, and once I was ready to move on I heard a piano playing from down the hall. It was a calm tune for a minute, but then I heard something I never thought I would hear in a calm piece. Frustration.

I didn't know that an instrument, much less a piano, would have to capability of distributing so many emotions. I wasn't into music in the first place, but my parents did force me to play with a lap harp for a long time. My harp skills don't even compare to what I'm listening to, but I never put my heart into it like this guy did.

I got up and peeked through the small window on the door. The room was empty with only a piano and a tall slender guy with black hair facing away from the door. I watched his hands migrate across the keys with grace, and his body shifted with the music. ' _He's enjoying himself?'_

If this guy is dancing to his own music, why were there different negative emotions flowing through the delicate tune? I didn't think about it too much and decided to enjoy the music.

Once the song converted, emotion seeped through more than the previous piece. As the music cleared my mind, my body began to feel numb. Once I was completely taken over, my eyes were already closed and I felt that I've heard this piece before. I hummed with the piano and knew that humming wasn't enough to let out my feelings that were filling me with rage and frustration, so I ran to the music room to pick up a lap harp. When I picked it up I felt familiarity but also something foreign. "I hope I remember how to play this thing." It's been years since I've played, but when I did it was from boredom.

I rushed toward the room filled with excitement, hoping that I didn't take too long. Once I found the piano room, I walked around to find a spot close enough to hear the piano, and I set the harp gently into my lap. My fingers felt the rhythm and energy of the gentle tune, so all I did was close my eyes to let the energy flow from my ears to my fingers.

 ***"Approaching Night"***

As I played I asked myself, ' _Why I didn't do this in the first place?_ ' His emotions transformed so beautifully that I couldn't help but feel the same as I played with him. Sadness, frustration, and a hint of happiness flowed through my mind as I moved the strings. After a minute of playing the energy overflowed through my fresh warm tears, and my heart felt so light and full at the same time. I wasn't sure if I was releasing my emotions, but I did feel at peace as I heard the piano and the harp blend together like they were meant to.

A six minute song became three long and beautiful hours in my mind, and I truly felt that night was coming slowly. I watched the sun disappear into the horizon the full moon shined through the indigo sky among the stars. The Fireflies glowed through the dirt and long grass as I visualize the earth. I felt the warmth of summer in my skin and each strand of my auburn hair danced with the cool evening breeze. My fingers remained on the rhythm of the wonderful and calm melody. My troubles in life will never ruin this moment, so the piano room truly became my sanctuary.

Even though the music ended, I was still stuck in my illusion and never wanted to leave. Reality didn't exist here and that's what I wanted since I was forced to live a life that wasn't meant for me. My fingers were numb and ready to play, but time began again when I heard a chair moving against the floor in the other room.

I packed the harp from panic and my heart raced every second as I heard footsteps getting louder and louder until the door began open. Even though everything was was a mess I picked up my bag and carried the harp in my arms and sprinted to the nearest corner. My breathing was hard and unsteady along with my heart beat. I held my breath and placed my hand over my dry mouth to control myself from making anymore obvious noises.

I heard the door close, but what I wasn't hearing was his feet. Where is he going? Which way is he going to go? Can he hear me? Questions were constantly thrown at me, but what I didn't ask myself was if he knew where I was. When I glance past the corner my heart jumped as I saw him right in front of me. His face was expressionless as his amber eyes was like the glow of the evening sunset.

I felt my soul being searched, and his eyes didn't move an inch. I felt him inside my mind and I saw my own flaws, my pain, my lack of confidence, and my lies. ' _No, I don't want to see anymore!'_ I looked down, away from his gaze, and felt my heart being crushed again from reality. I lied to my parents, to An-chan, and to myself, and as I was reminded I felt more ashamed than I ever had before.

My face felt hot again and I felt my body begin to tremble, but then I felt a warm comforting hand being gently placed on my head. My shoulders relaxed, my heart was light, and my tears faded away from his warmth.

* * *

"RISTU! Why were you not here at 5:30 like someone with a special dinner should be!? It's 5:43!" My mother rambled on and yelled in my ear, which is not a surprise to me, and for once I didn't hear too much of it. Once my mother pulled me inside, An-chan greeted me with a smile. "Rit-chan, I made the cake you wanted."

To be honest, I wasn't hungry at all. Once Mother and An-chan went to a different room I climbed upstairs to my bedroom and collapsed on my bed. Once that boy made me see all of my flaws I felt exposed for the fake that I truly was. I felt my heart constantly drop as those memories replayed in my head over and over again. This pain existed for a long time, but I just discovered that it was worse than I thought.

Once dinner was served I sat next to An-chan as I was expected to, and then the talk of my future commenced. An-chan was doing all of the talking, and I sat there like the puppet I was meant to be. None of the questions were directed specifically to me, but even if they were An-chan would probably answer since she was excited. Every answer that was given to my parents was something I was against, and as each question was answered my mind screamed at both my parents and An-chan. _'I don't want to get married. I don't love An-chan. I want to create my future myself, and I don't want your input!'_

At last I lost my appetite and my patience and pushed the untouched plate of curry to the side. "Please excuse me. I'm not feeling well." As I started to walk away no one stopped their conversation, so I headed back to my bedroom and fell asleep as I felt my head ache.

I sat in the seat to my first class and got myself focused for math, but that focus snapped once I heard a few girls talk about someone that sounded familiar. "He's two years older than us, and he's so handsome with beautiful amber eyes!" All the other girls faces lit up at the description of this guy, and they all begged for the name. "Saga." As she talked more about him I couldn't take in anymore as a voice in my head repeated his name over and over.

 _'Saga.'_

I couldn't focus on anything and couldn't stop thinking about wanting to get my mind off of the life I was living and the pianist named Saga. I wanted more than to just play the harp, I wanted hear him play again. I decided to go to the music room after school, but I told myself that I wouldn't play the harp with Senpai anymore.

When I played it became a pleasure, a feeling that would become an uncontrollable addiction. I played the harp and felt the feeling of illusional freedom, and once I came back to my harsh reality I felt like I was losing myself to pain. I was exposed to my true feelings for the first time, and I couldn't get those feelings out of my head without feeling nauseated.

I walked toward the piano room and his music was echoing in the halls like they were trying to reach someone. The piece was full of grief and sorrow that it made even my heart want to shed tears. As I walked the music got louder and as the song progressed I felt more of his sadness. Once I was in front of the room the song ended, but there was a surprise in front of the door to the piano, the harp.

 ***"Racing Against the Sunset"***

In front of the uncased instrument was a note card. 'Racing Against the Sunset' I didn't know what to do, I promised myself not to play anymore but Senpai used some of his time to find a harp for me to play. The piano began the song like he knew I was here.

I picked up the harp and felt fear but I couldn't help myself to becoming a victim of my own feelings. I sat down and once I got used to the sound of the piece, my fingers started to lightly pull the strings. My fear suddenly disappeared as I felt pleasure. I was releasing all of the grief I locked up in my heart.

I closed my eyes and saw nothing but darkness at first, but then a waxing crescent moon shined through the thin branches of trees growing above me. The cool wind brushed against my goosebumps and my body was getting cooler and cooler. The dry leaves flew in the air as the wind howled, I looked toward the direction of the wind and saw a hill. The wind pushed me harder and harder toward the hill until I finally started walking.

The grass became greener as I walked, but the wind was still harsh to push me further up the only hill in sight. My mind was blank the whole time and I felt like I was a set of eyes floating in the air watching this unknown land. My body felt warmer and my feet felt lighter even though the wind remained.

Finally I reached the top and saw the sun shine through the gaps of the clouds. In that light was a small tree and from the look of it, but it was dying. The leaves were a dark green with a hint of brown on the edges, and the tree itself didn't look healthy.

The sun went down some more and as the light dimmed the tree's leaves lost more of its green color. I looked around to the horizon and dark ominous trees covered the land. Fear rushed into my body and I started to tremble at the sight of darkness consuming the land that was once bathed in sunlight.

The song came to its conclusion and the land faded away until I opened my eyes. I was in shock and was unable to move. The harp was still in my lap being squeezed by my trembling hands. The door opened and out came the pianist. I looked up and a single fresh tear poured from my eye as I looked into his eyes and realized that this boy just revealed his own jaded soul to me.

His face didn't say anything, but I knew that this guy was going through something worse than me. I stood up and the harp fell from my lap as I embraced Senpai. I didn't care if I knew him or not but I couldn't leave him, I wanted to revive him from the living dead. His school uniform was full of my snot and tears at this point and his hand rested in his pant pockets. "Senpai... I won't give up, so..." I gave the last of my strength to my next words. "Please! Please don't give up either!" I felt Senpai grab my shoulders and push me away. His eyes were stern and gentle. "If you don't take control of your life, someone else will."

Senpai released my shoulders and walked away. ' _He saw my soul too.'_


	2. Two

**I do NOT own Sekaiichi Hatsukoi!**

* * *

I couldn't keep my eyes from senpai as he walked from the piano room to the real world, and it certainly came quick. "Masamune, why are you still here!? You have a contest tomorrow and you're here goofing off!" But his reality was a lot closer than the school exit. I looked behind me and saw a middle aged woman dressed in a suit that made her look intelligent and intimidating... she's got to be his mother. Senpai didn't say a word and his face remained expressionless, but he did show respect for this woman and responded the way every obedient son would. Once she walked out the door senpai turned toward me and placed his bag over his shoulder.

"Want to get something to eat?"

His question got me out of thinking about what I saw and responded like nothing happened. "Sure."

We walked across many roads in silence until we came upon a place I've never seen before. "Pandaway..." I wasn't sure what to think of it at first but I then remembered a lot of my classmates talking about going to this place.

Senpai walked in and I slowly followed. The place was small and the smell of bread made my stomach rumble.

"You going to order something?"Senpai looked at me as if he already made his order. Even though I didn't know what I wanted to eat, I gave out an immediate reply. "Uh, yes. Umm... Uhh...I-I'll have what he ordered."

I couldn't believe how fast those sandwiches came out, so I took a bite to see if it was real and was surprised.

"... It's delicious!"

"You've never tried fast food?"

"Never." We sat there quietly while munching on our sandwiches, but once mine was completely consumed I desperately broke the silence.

"Umm by the way that woman mentioned something about you participating in a contest. Are you playing the piano?"

"Yes."

"I see. Where is it taking place?"

His mouth was full of food. "... You would't enjoy it."

Senpai's eyes didn't reach mine, he only focused on consuming his tuna sandwich. I started to feel disappointed at his response.

"So you don't want me to come."

"I don't have the right to tell you what you can or can't do. Seems like you receive enough of _that_ already."

My heart felt heavy when he said those words.

"But if you do decide to go, it's going to be at Teito University at six."

I wanted to ask him so many questions about him, but the image of the dead forest flashed into my mind and decided otherwise until I couldn't take it anymore.

"You told me something back at school before that lady came in..." Senpai's eyes were now focused on mine. "... What did you see?" Right then I felt like I asked a stupid question, there's no way that he could've seen anything.

"It's not a matter of what I saw, but of what I heard. When you first played the harp I wanted to stop playing, and while you were playing it was just a bunch of mess at first."

"Sorry I haven't touched the harp in years. I must have sounded horrible."

"No. Your emotions were unreadable, you let out too much at a time. As time went by I heard you cry out for help, but when we played today I felt like I was on an island. The island was small and surrounded by a sea. In the middle of the island was a single palm tree, once I got a closer look, it was growing apples."

"Apples?"

"Apples. The only living thing on that island was a purple finch. It ate from the tree and as long as it grew apples there was a bird on its branches."

"That doesn't sound so bad." I mumbled to myself.

"Your REAL problem was that the palm tree was not growing what its supposed to grow and every time it grew more apples the sea of _acid_ ate away more of the island. And it does all of this for a stupid bird."

I started shaking until we were outside again.

"Well, now that I think about it, I know your history, but not your name."

"Oh, It's Ritsu..."

When I felt my last name start come out of my mouth I stopped myself. I didn't want to hide anything from him, but that name has given me too much grief. I didn't want it to become a problem anymore.

"What, no last name?"

"O-Oda. Ritsu Oda."

' _Oda_?' Of all the names I choose **that**?

"Well then Ritsu Oda, I'll see you tomorrow."

* * *

It was fifteen minutes until the event. The stage was brightly lit with a piano waiting to be played. Unfortunately when my parents found out that I was coming here they made me bring An-chan. Her wide smile was sparkling with her eyes as she looked around and waited with anticipation.

"Ricchan, I didn't know you were interested in the piano! Do you play?"

"No. I've never played the piano."

The lights dimmed until the stage popped. I looked inside the pamphlets that were given out and spotted Senpai's name. He's number fourteen and there were only fifteen people. As I saw his name my mind visualized yesterday's conversation and then realized that Senpai didn't tell me his name. Not that he needed to.

As each pianist played their piece I heard their bad notes, their loss in tempo, and lots of passion. Everyone wanted to play their hearts out, but I guess stage fright takes away the chance to be a little more creative I guess.

Finally number fourteen, I sat at the edge of my seat and awaited for his fingers to touch the keys. His hands were still for a good few seconds until the first note hit everyone's ears. An-chan was in awe as she watch Senpai play and a lot of whispering flowed around the room. They were all praising him and his talent, but something wasn't right.

His notes were perfect, the tempo was perfect, and his posture and confidence were outstanding, but I was extremely confused and disappointed. Senpai was right I was not enjoying ANY of it.

His emotions were absent, I was hearing nothing but the notes. The piece was beautiful and he played it well, but I was hoping to hear more than a robot playing something perfect.

I couldn't listen anymore otherwise my anger would get out of control. I walked outside and sat on a nearby bench until the whole thing was over. Disappointment was all I felt, and I didn't want to see senpai anymore today otherwise I may hurt him. I sat out here until I saw everyone walking out.

"I heard you Masamune..." I jumped at the sound of Senpai's name and found them under a tree, far away from the sidewalk. I sneaked my way toward them and sat near a bush. "In the second half of the piece I heard your emotions even though I specifically TOLD you not to!" Senpai's eyes stayed on his mother and his voice remained expressionless with a hint of sadness. "I won first place mom, can't you just be proud of me?"

*SLAP*

My hands clenched into a fist and I felt as if my head was on fire. "WHY should I be proud of someone who doesn't do as they are told. You'll never make it big at this rate, you are a huge disappointment to the family." His mother snatched a piece of paper from his son's hand, tore it in half, and threw it on the ground as she stormed off. "Don't bother coming home until you're ready to be a good son."

The sky turned orange as the wind picked up the paper and flew away, as the paper traveled in the wind I saw the word " _Congratulations_ ". Before I knew it, my arms were tightly wrapped around Senpai's cold body. I looked up to senpai's face and found that his eyes were hidden in his dark hair. I wanted to look him in the eyes and let my heart pour out. I knew right then that he was trying to meet his mother's high expectations, but at the same time he also wanted to be himself.

The hill in the dead forest was him trying to keep him from being completely taken over, but there's only one tree left and once that light is gone... "Senpai I'm sorry I left you in there. I should've been there for you, but I was selfish. You were doing this for your mother not me. I don't think anything is wrong with your emotions, in fact I think they're beautiful! You can stay over at my place if you need to until you feel better." His face slowly moved closer to mine, so I was ready to listen to what he had to say. I didn't hear a whisper at all, but I did feel his soft lips against mine.

"I'll come over if you let me."

The both of us walked together in silence since we really had nothing to talk about. I was sure that senpai was trying to keep himself in check when it came to his personal life and his emotional state, but every human heart is fragile.

My heart was still pounding, and it was driving me insane. Just when I thought he was going to whisper something in my ear back then, he decided to... kiss me.

I messaged An-chan an apology for leaving her and told her that I had an emergency. I knew that she wouldn't get too upset, but I knew that my Mother was going to flip tables when I get home. Once I placed my phone in my pocket I checked on Senpai, he was resting close beside me and his eyes were still hidden from the world, including me. His face was making the same blank expression as he sat with no noticeable body languages. He hides his pain very well, but it makes me uncomfortable.

"I'm letting my parents know that you're staying for dinner. What's your favorite thing to eat?"

No answer.

"After dinner we may get some dorayaki, It's sure you'll like it! "

Still no answer. I knew talking to him was pointless, but it made everything less awkward.

I looked out the window and thought about what we're doing once we get home. ' _Hmm, I don't think games suit him, maybe he likes books. Or maybe...'_ the kiss popped into my head and when I snapped out of it, I found my fingers touching my lips. ' _No! No! No! Senpai is just not feeling well! He kissed from emotional distress that's IT!'_ I wasn't sure why but I felt my heart ache and decided to pretend that the kiss never happened.

Ever since I met Senpai I forgot about my problems and sometimes I would think about him constantly. I used to think about my parents expectations, An-chan, and me taking over the company, but lately I haven't felt burdened by it.

Just when I was in my thoughts I felt my body jump to sudden contact and found Senpai's hand holding mine. His hand was still cold and his grip was weak. Right then I didn't care if we were both guys, I turned my hand over and our fingers intertwined. I'll admit though... I was probably turning red.

* * *

"Ritsu you left An-chan ALONE."

"I messaged her." I REALLY didn't want to deal with mother's drama.

"That's not how you treat-!" She then saw senpai. "Ritsu, is this a friend of yours?"

"Yes, this is Masamune Saga. He was in the piano competition at Teito University."

"Nice to meet you. Go and head upstairs. Ritsu we'll continue later."

I sighed from relief and obeyed. Once we got to my room I sat Senpai down on the bed. "You feeling any better?"

No answer. I didn't want to push him but I couldn't stand seeing him like this, so I walked toward my bookshelf and took out a few books. "Do you like to read Senpai? Usami Akihiko's works are amazing! Here I'll let you borrow some of his books." He picked up the book and opened it, I was sure he was going to enjoy himself, but I spoke too soon. When I came back with more books I saw tears drops inside of the book. He finally broke down.

I sat beside him remembering something. "We have a piano in the next room if you want to play." Maybe he wanted to release some of the pain.

 **Light and Shadow**

He closed the book and I watched him walk outside the room. I couldn't go with him, because if I did I think I would cry in front of him. He just needed to let everything out on his own. I waited for a while so I picked up all the books that were on the bed and began to place them back on the shelf until I heard something delicate.

As he played each note felt like rain, and they were soft and sad. The hill came back in my vision and everything was almost dead including the grass. The sky was ominous with nothing but dark clouds that no light could penetrate. The tree itself only had three leaves left and life was no longer in the brown leaves. It's too late, Senpai was gone and forever trapped in a life that he couldn't control. He knew that this was the risk of a pianist and as a human being.

The wind was no longer around calling for help, and as the song sped up all of the trees around the hill crumbled to dust slowly one by one. I watched him give in to the chaos as each tree disintegrated. As the song came to its slow, soft ending there was one tree barely standing and two of the three leaves fell to the lifeless ground. I picked up the two dead leaves and held them close to my heart. On the last note the tree and the last leaf crumbled into dust and my vision turned white.

I slowly opened my eyes and found myself unable to cry. I got up and opened the door to the next bedroom to find one of the maids sitting on the sofa across the piano crying her eyes out. Her hands were on her heart like mine was, but when I opened my hands I found the two tree leaves in my right hand.

"Master Onodera, I apologize I was cleaning then I saw him come in and play the piano. *Sniffle* It was so beautiful that I couldn't help myself." I honestly didn't care about the maid, and as she rambled on I walked toward Senpai.

His hand felt the keys like he was saying goodbye. "Senpai?"

"I'm fine now, so there's no reason for me to stay anymore." He stood up and started walking toward the hallway. "Thank you for having me over."

I stood there listening to his foot steps get softer and softer until I hear the front door close. I wanted to stop him, but if he has no motivation there's nothing I could possibly do. I knew that, but I still felt disappointed. I opened my hand and examined the proof of Senpai's death. The leaves were brown and dry. Under the leaves there was an acorn. A small, tiny acorn.

* * *

A few weeks later everyone was still talking about Senpai's achievement. The piece he played and how he played it was never mentioned, it was only about how 'cute' or 'mysterious' he is. There's one girl in my class who claims to have a crush on senpai, and her friends are telling her to ask him out. As I'm hearing all this I feel my body getting hotter throughout the conversation. I wanted to claim him as my own but at the same time I knew that two guys in a relationship is not something anyone could just _go_ for, so then I asked my self, ' _Why should I stop her?_ '

Once I was ready to walk home I found An-chan outside the door. Her head was down and her face was red, she looked nervous.

"Rit-chan,I know this seems dumb, but I've been thinking about this for a while now. For a while now you have been happier and I don't know why because I don't know you as much as I would like to."

Is she trying to get closer to me? I wasn't sure, but I didn't want her to know me. I just found out about my feelings for senpai and now THIS happens. I don't want her to know about these feelings.

"I want us to hang out more, is that okay?"

 _'No!'_

"An-chan, I'm sorry I don't think I'm ready for this right now. I'm not the one you want."

I had to reject her otherwise I'll remain a victim. An-chan gave off the look of disappointment, and her eyes were gleaming like she was about to cry.

"I see... Is there someone else that you're in love with?"

I felt my heart skip a beat, and I could no longer look her in the eye. As the question repeated in my head I thought of Senpai. Sure he's mysterious and emotionless at first glance, but as I got to know him I saw a sensitive musician. Even when the piano isn't playing I know that he's emotional and kind, he even cares about those around him enough to try to change. Even though he changes for another person he finds a way to also be himself without fail. I felt that my problems were becoming nonexistent, not because his life was worse than mine, but because of his... Love. He gave me love when I was running empty, and I gave him acceptance.

I still regret leaving him to play for someone important to him at the University, he must have felt that he lost my acceptance. His mother wasn't the source of the darkness in his heart, he still had a dim light shining on the tree. I rejected him when he needed me the most.

"Yes. I'm sorry."

I sprinted to the the shoe lockers and hoped that I'd get there before Senpai left. Before I got there I felt the earth shake beneath my feet, and when I looked out the window rain came crashing down. I ran faster, if I could, so I don't miss him.

Once I got there lightning was constantly blinding me as I looked around for Senpai. In the distance I only saw different umbrellas and the same uniform walking in the same direction. My heart was in pain, a pain that couldn't be healed by time. It was unbearable to even think about waiting until tomorrow or even another hour. I ran in the ran, not even caring about changing my shoes or getting wet. I looked under each umbrella and didn't see any familiar faces. Finally one last person in the distance with a clear umbrella, I spotted his dark hair felt relief. I grabbed his shoulder and found another unfamiliar face.

My legs gave out and I felt my knees hit the ground. My face felt frozen like it couldn't change anymore, and as I felt the pain in my heart worsen, tears blended with the rain. I sat there for a good three minutes or so and walked back to the school. When a roof was above me I found my locker and was about to change my shoes until something captured my attention. _Saga._

I found a locker above mine with his name on it, and when I opened it his school shoes weren't present. That's when I heard a familiar sound.

 ***Distant Memory***

A piano. I couldn't believe it. Senpai got back on the piano, but when did he decide to play again?

I walked into the school, even though I was soaked to the bone, and listened. Power and grief collided and it felt destructive, but forgiving.

As I got closer to the room everything turned white and I knew where I was headed. I was on top of the dead hill that held no sunshine. I went to a soft patch of dirt and started digging with my hands. Once I had a decent sized hole in the ground I reached into my pocket and took out the tiny acorn. I pulled off the two dead leaves attached to it and dropped it into the earth.

Once it was buried I felt the wind howl once again. As the wind blew, all of the remains of the dead trees were carried away into the horizon. I opened my hand and let the two leaves fly off into the sky with the remains. I took off my uniform top and squeezed the water over the buried acorn. The sky remained gloomy, and I knew that I was the only one who could give life back to this sad soul.

I opened the door with my uniform jacket in my hand and saw him turn toward me with tears in his eyes. "Saga Senpai..." That's all my mouth would let out as I walked toward him with my heart feeling lighter with each step.

* * *

 **Almost done...**

 **Please leave a comment. :)**


	3. Three

**I added more in this chapter. Sorry it's short, but it's all I had left.**

 **Song(s) of Chapter: Courage to Change -Philip Wesley**

 **I do NOT own Sekaiichi Hatsukoi or the characters.**

* * *

I didnt know what to do. What can I do? Senpai was done playing and he didnt turn to look at me, but Im sure he knew that he wasn't alone.

"Go home."

My heart sank from his cold words. "Saga Senpai?" I didnt was to leave him. I felt that if I leave him now some thing terrible might happen.

"Go home! You annoy me, following me everyday. Is peace and quiet too much to ask for!?"

I was speechless, He was never like this before. Its like he finally didn't even turn around to look at me, and I think his voice was shaking. My throat dried out as I was asking myself what to do next. I then thought about the hill and remembered that the sunlight was completely clouded. I planted the seed, but without sunlight the plant won't rise far from the ground.

"Senpai, I think you should start trying." He stood and walked toward me with a soulless look in his eye, and all I remember next is a stinging sensation on my right cheek.

"Do you really-?" He then grabbed my collar and anger was all I could read on his face. "WHAT DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN DOING!? I HAVE BEEN WORKING MY TAIL OFF FOR EVERYONE AND YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT I NEED TO _'TRY'_!?

My heart was pounding and my breathing almost got out of hand. "Umm, I..."

"You what!? You don't even know what you want and you're sitting here judging MY actions when you should be adjusting yours!"

I felt my eyes tearing up, I didn't know what to say. His words peirced my ego like a knife. I know that Saga senpai is in more trouble than I am, or maybe I just don't want to face my problems yet.

"Don't bother me anymore, I want to be alone."

Once I got home I found An-chan talking with my mother with tears pouring down.

"Ritsu, we need to have an important family discussion."

My mothers eyes told me that there was no way out of this, so for the next hour before dinner I had to prepare myself. Senpai was right and I'm sick of hiding. Its time for my family to know the truth.

Once dinner started it was quiet, awkwardly quiet, for the first few minutes. I turned toward An-chan and saw her picking at her food looking like she was going to bawl.

"Rit-chan..." It finally began. "Did I do something wrong? I can't help but feel like I did something that made you despise me."

My heart was splitting in two. Each tear that fell from her chin made my guilt grow, I should've explained more back then.

"No An-chan, you have the wrong idea. I never had feelings for you other than a friend."

"Ahem!" Mother's eyes basically told me to take that last comment back.

Heat went to my head and I slammed my hands on the table. "What else do you want me to say mother!? A lie!? I am sick of lying all the time about the marriage, my feelings, and who I love. I love An-chan like a sister, and that's never going to change." I grab An-chan's hand gently and kissed it as gently as I could.

"I'm sorry An-chan. I should've told you this a long time ago. I can't accept your feelings. It would be wrong to have a marriage from lies and nonexistent love. I promise it wouldn't last long, and I don't want that for _anyone_." My mother didn't move a muscle or say anything. My father seemed indifferent as he consumed his meal.

"Please excuse me." I felt that if I stayed any longer I would just make things worse, so I got up from the table and left the house. I feeling free for the first time in my life. My heart didn't feel heavy, my stomach didn't ache and I felt freedom for the first time in a while. I was ready to tell Senpai.

Once I got to the school I saw Senpai leaving. "Saga Senpai!" He turned for a second then kept walking. I felt my anger rise again and ran as fast as I could and when I got to him I grabbed his shoulder tight.

"Senpai. I did it. I told everyone the truth." His face didn't change.

"Aren't you mad about what I said to you?"

"I'm sorry, I know I can be a little creepy at times, but I... This might sound insane, but I feel joy when I'm around you, like I can truly be myself. Every time I see you I feel funny like you're someone I can't live without. And when I hear you play the piano it inspires me, and I get to know you better. I don't know! I just cant stand to be away from you!" Oh god what just came out of my mouth!?

"...How straight forward of you." I was embarrassed. He must think that I'm a real creeper now. I felt like dying under a bridge.

"I'm sorry I guess I'm still-" I felt a warm hand being placed on my cheek and soon after I felt Senpai's lips crash into mine. It was different than last time, it was passionate and I felt the suns rays shining on us through the clouds. I then felt his hot tongue slip into my mouth and felt light headed. I never had a kiss like this before especially from a guy. I felt my body being pressed into his, then my head went fuzzy. His body was warm and comforting and his tongue was exploring me nonstop. I didn't know what to do, I felt powerless as my legs weakened, but it felt _amazing_.

He released me after what seemed like ages. If I said I was embarrassed a moment ago I think that was an understatement. I couldn't even look Senpai in the eye and I didn't know what to do, much less what to say.

"Want to come over?"

That was sudden! "Uh-uh no!? I mean yes? ARGH! Extra large!? I-I don't know!"

"We can play some music, I want to see something."

I was then able to get out of my brain scramble. "O-Okay." What was I even thinking about?

The first thing I saw when Senpai opened the door was a small kitten sitting at the front door like it was waiting for someone. "I'm home Sorata." He picked up the kitten and carried it over his shoulders as he kicked off his shoes.

"The piano is upstairs in the third room on the left. I'll get us something to drink.

"Okay."

It felt weird being inside of Senpai's home. I was nervous the whole day just thinking about it and now I'm here. In the room I saw a piano in the corner and a sofa on the other side of the room. The room had an atmosphere that wasn't comforting, it was cold and lonely. I took out the harp and played a little to get myself comfortable.

"I brought some tea."

"Thank you."

Senpai sat on the stool facing away from the piano. "So how did they take it?"

"Huh?"

"When you told everyone the truth?"

"Mother wasn't amused, I'm not sure about my Father, and An-chan... I hope An-chan will forgive me one day... How's your relationship with your Mother?"

Senpai looked down with the same plain expression and took a minute before he answered.

"I'm not playing the piano competitively anymore."

Yikes. "I bet she didn't take it well."

"To be honest I didn't either. The piano was my only source of happiness and joy, but even then I still felt miserable."

"You should find something that makes you feel that joy without depending on someone else's joy. I don't think the piano did anything for you, I think you made your happiness dependent on someone else's. To be honest not once have I seen you smile."

Senpai didn't say anything else. He turned toward the piano, adjusted his chair, and said, "Let's begin."

With the harp in my lap and Senpai on the piano we were ready to... I guess soul search.

 ***Courage to Change***

The fast paced piece challenged me a bit, but in time I got the pattern and focused on listening more than playing. My body became lighter and my soul felt brighter. I found myself in the forest full of darkness, and there was no wind this time once I climbed the hill there was nothing but bright sunlight. The sunlight was warm and comforting, but there was no life on this hil anymore.

I took the seed out of my pocket and decided that I would be there for Senpai with no judgement. I dug into the dirt and placed the seed gently inside the soft soil and buried it. Once I was walking away from the hill I wondered, what can I do for Senpai to keep this tree alive and healthy. I was overcome with minor anxiety until I felt the wind blow gently. _"Acceptance."_

The piece was only 3 minutes long and when my fingers ended the music I looked up at Senpai. He sat there turned toward the piano, but when I was back on my feet I saw something shine in the light. It was his tears.

"What did you do to me?"

His voice was shaking as his tears flowed. "All I did was accept you. After I planted the seed, I wanted to be the one that supports you in what you do. You don't have to do anything for me except to accept yourself in return. So, what did you see?"

He wiped his tears. "You stopped producing apples, so all I had to do was watch the finch fly away."

He turned and I saw his lips curl slightly upward. I couldn't believe it, I was seeing his smile.

* * *

 **The End**

 **Hoped you like it.**


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